In our first world society, convenience seems to reign as king. With movies on demand, robotic car washes, and instant information just a few keystrokes away, we live in a while-you-wait culture. Admittedly, I often find myself embracing these practicalities—especially when it comes to meals on the go, or fast food. As disgusting and unsatisfying as it generally is, the brainlessness of simply shouting a number into a plastic box while sitting in my warm car is a perfect illustration of the word “easy.”
Convenience does not come without cost. Increases in productivity often lead to decreases in personality. Human interaction becomes a series of quick words—almost a scripted, robotic dance of the tongue.
“Welcome to McDonald’s. Would you like to try an Egg White Delight sandwich today? Go ahead and order when you’re ready.”
Wait…what? What was that middle thing again? I think it was a question. Was I supposed to answer it, because there wasn’t even enough time to comprehend what you said before you were telling me to order when I was ready. In fact, you said it so quickly and without inflection or emotion that it actually sounded like, “WelcometoMcDonald’swouldyouliketotryanEggWhiteDelightsandwichtodaygoaheadandorderwhenyou’reready…” I have a better chance of understanding Charlie Brown’s teacher than I do this nonsense. What follows is worse: “Dollarsixhowareyou.” Window closes. Window opens. Receipt is shoved my direction without the person making eye contact. “Thankyouhaveaniceday.” Hmmm.
Sadly, we’ve become conditioned to these kinds of interchanges. We’ve mastered our lines for our parts in this tragic play. Rather than engaging one another as living, breathing human beings (ones with feelings and emotions), we instead carry on soulless interchanges.
Sometimes, I give in to this mindless behavior, either out of laziness or habit, or because just like the fast food itself, it’s easy. Other times, I get irritated by it, frustrated by the absence of personality (the auto attendant for my insurance company has more life in it than do these people). But sometimes, when I am feeling a bit rebellious toward the system, I’ll do something scandalous—I’ll purposefully deviate from the script, break character, and…actually engage them. Cheeky, right?! When I’m told to order when I’m ready, instead of grunting, “3 with large tea,” I’ll say, “Hi there! How’s your day going?” Silence. Stupor. Oops, I broke the rules. I’ve recognized them as living creatures instead of cogs in a wheel and they are thrown off their game. Honestly, it’s uncomfortable for both of us—it’s not the way things work. It’s weird. But it’s also curiously gratifying.
I’m not singling out fast food workers by any means—there are certainly many awesome people occupying these windows whose personality is present. No, we all do this. It’s not just in our business dealings, but also in our social relationships. I’ve experienced the lackadaisical, checked-out way people barely look at me as they hand me my coffee and say “Thankyoucomeagain,” and I’ve been witness to it when someone asks “How are you today?” and then stares right through me as if I wasn’t even there. I had someone ask about something in my life and then walk away while I was still answering their question. I once was telling him of how my dad had become quite ill and had to go to the hospital for an operation, when I was interrupted (mid-sentence) with, “Yeah, my weekend was kind of boring…” and then they walked out of the room. That hurts.
We were created for community, not this. We’ve become a society full of lovers of ourselves and hoarders of our time. We allow the doldrums of our routines to suck out our personalities and rob us of the richness found in communication and interaction. Listen, people like to be acknowledged with more than a passive grunt. We want to be heard. We like to be appreciated. We need to be loved. It’s simply part of our DNA.
My faith tells me that God is love and that we were created in the image of God. To dehumanize or shrug off with blatant indifference a fellow human being, I think, is disrespectful—not only to that person, but to the one who created him or her. It’s true that not everyone is as likable, lovable, or as easy to engage as some others, but that shouldn’t prevent us from trying. It’s amazing what a well-placed word or tiniest act of kindness can do in someone’s life. Even cracking someone’s mold can allow enough sunshine to get in and germinate whatever awesomeness is hiding dormant deep inside.
So find an opportunity—rather, create an opportunity—whether at the drive-thru, the checkout stand, the church lobby, or the doctor’s office and engage. Break the rules. Ask how their day is going, but don’t leave it at that. Offer genuine followup questions or comments. Look them in the eyes and find out their name. In the words of Bob Goff, say to them, “It’s great to SEE you.” Elevate them from their mindless routine and acknowledge them as people of worth. Sure, it might be awkward, but it’s necessary and it’s good. We all clumsily stumble around in this silly social dance, bumping into each other like programmed robots, but that’s not life—it’s certainly not a healthy one.
** Please share this post with others. Kindly I say, “Thank you. Come again.”
Please share this with others